What was the last thing that you did that you were really excited about, but couldn’t quite pull it off?
A new diet? A new business idea?
Ever wanted to start a new exercise routine?
You start really excited: “I’m going to go to the gym every day!”
Then you use this excitement to get committed: “I’m gonna pay hundreds of dollars for a gym membership and a trainer!”
Then you start experiencing that “DRIFT.” That’s where you start falling off your gym routine. It’s called the drift because you’re drifting away from your original plan.
“Ahh, well, my metabolism is different…” That’s me. You start to hear negative voices in your head and make up excuses for not going to the gym.
Then you talk to your friend about their new diet, which has helped them lose 20 lbs in 2 weeks!
Suddenly, you’re super excited about this new diet. This is what we call getting Shiny New Object Syndrome: “A new diet! This one would work 10x better for me!” You forget about the gym and your personal trainer and focus on this exciting new thing.
Then, a few weeks later, after making basically NO progress with the new diet, you experience Regret: “Man…I could’ve gotten better results if I just stuck to what I’d been doing in the first place.”
Who’s been along for that ride?
This is what we call the “Self-Sabotage Cycle,” and it happens when we try to make significant changes or improvements to our lives that require a lot of self-motivation and discipline.
So, how can we break the cycle? How can we anticipate this self-sabotage in time to prevent it?
Keep reading to find out!
In this guide, you’ll learn:
- Why can’t you finish anything you start?
- How to finish what you start
💡Key takeaways:
- Most people struggle to finish what they start because they fall into the Self-Sabotage Cycle, which includes phases of excitement, commitment, drift, and self-sabotage.
- The key to knowing how to finish what you start is having grit, which is the passion and perseverance to achieve your long-term goals.
- Grit is made up of four key elements: interest, practice, purpose, and faith.
Why can’t you finish anything you start?
There are a few reasons we don’t finish what we start.
First, we’re chronic procrastinators.
In fact, studies show that as many as 95% of people procrastinate and end up struggling to get things done.
Some people also struggle with perfectionism or completion anxiety, which is the fear that you won’t be able to meet others’ standards.
And mental health conditions like depression or ADHD can cause us to give up on what we started or get stuck, too.
But self-sabotage is the biggest reason I see people not finishing what they start.
Let’s take a closer look at the Self-Sabotage Cycle I mentioned earlier, using a new diet as an example:
- Phase 1: Excitement. You’ve set a weight loss goal and are ready to tackle it.
- Phase 2: Commitment. You’ve bought the cookbooks and created a meal plan.
- Phase 3: Drift. You start falling back into your old eating habits.
- Phase 4: Self-sabotage. You participate in negative self-talk and make excuses for drifting away from your new diet.
- Phase 5: Shiny New Object syndrome. Your friend has lost five pounds in a week! You get excited by those results, decide that diet will work for you, and commit.
- Phase 6: Regret. You start to realize you could have seen results if you’d stuck with your original plan.
It happens any time we decide to make a big life change or set a goal that requires a lot of self-motivation and discipline.
I talk more about the Self-Sabotage Cycle in this video:
Keep reading to learn how to finish what you start.
How to finish what you start
The truth is that stages one through three of the Self-Sabotage Cycle will always be there.
But if you can silence the negative self-talk and avoid the dreaded drift, you’ll see the results you wanted in the first place – without self-sabotage or regret.
To do it, you need what’s called grit.
Angela Duckworth, who literally wrote the book on grit, defines it as “passion and perseverance for long-term goals.”
Having that passion is what’s going to help you learn how to finish what you start.
You might be thinking, “I’m not a naturally gritty person.”
And that’s okay, I promise! You can grow your grit and learn how to finish what you start.
At the end of your day, your grittiness comes down to four things: interest, practice, purpose, and faith.
1. Fall in love with your goal
People grittily pursue what interests them.
It’s not the same as Shiny New Object Syndrome – it’s staying curious about and focused on the same topic and seeing it through.
Really, it’s about falling in love with what you want to accomplish.
When you’re that dedicated to a goal, you naturally become more engaged and resilient, which sets you up for long-term success.
⚡Action item: To fall in love with your goal, meditate on what interests you about what you’re doing. Ask yourself why it makes you feel passionate and curious, and why you want to invest your time and energy into it.
2. Master deliberate practice
Practicing the right way is a huge part of knowing how to finish what you start.
And I don’t mean practice for practice’s sake.
I mean deliberate practice, which is more productive.
Studies show that deliberate practice boosts memory retention, automaticity, problem-solving skills, and motivation. It can even turn you into an expert.
Why?
Because when you practice deliberately, you’re focusing on being purposeful and task-centered, setting goals, and monitoring progress.
For some people, this means working with a teacher or coach.
But you can also do it on your own.
⚡Action item: Carve out space in your weekly schedule for regular practice, set specific goals, and ask for feedback when you’ve finished a session.
3. Find your purpose
The grittiest people have a strong connection to something larger than themselves, whether it’s their overall life purpose or some other higher meaning.
Having a clear “why” when it comes to chasing a goal will make it easier than ever to push past the drift, setbacks, and obstacles.
The stronger the bridge between your goal and your purpose, the faster you’ll figure out how to finish what you start.
For example, when I launched Lifehack Method, I knew my purpose was to help high achievers avoid burnout while being more productive than ever.
And that’s what made it possible for Demir and me to find the grit we needed to grow to where we are today.
⚡Action item: Connect your actions to your long-term goals or life mission by figuring out your “why.”
4. Believe in your goals
And finally, faith is what will really propel you toward learning how to finish what you start.
I don’t mean religious faith – I mean faith in yourself.
When you genuinely believe that if you put in the time and effort, you can accomplish ANY goal you set.
Truthfully, the most defiantly hopeful people are also the grittiest.
And they’re the ones who are most likely to overcome self-sabotage to succeed.
⚡Action item: Shift your belief from “I’ll never accomplish this” to “I can accomplish anything I put my mind to.” Over time, it will rewire your brain to grittiness and become true!
What’s next?
There you have it!
A full guide that will help you figure out how to finish what you start every time.
What else is a huge part of knowing how to finish what you start?
Planning.
And that’s why you should check out our Winning the Week Worksheet.
Our unique framework will help you overcome overwhelm and regain the control you need to finish what you start.
Get it here:
